Issues With Nerds

Last night I was at the midnight showing of the new Harry Potter movie, and it brought my attention to a terrible phenomenon, happening to people who are basically just like me. By this, I mean terribly nerdy and reclusive.
Obviously, I am far cooler and more awesome than most other people, but that is still no excuse for all of the Tragic Nerds out there.
I tried to find pictures on google images of what I'm talking about here, but it was simply far too depressing. This picture was really the best I could do.

The phenomenon to which I am referring is all of the people that seem to have simply given up on even trying to look remotely decent. I saw so many people in that lineup last night who cannot be described as anything but Tragic Nerds. You may be asking yourself what, exactly, defines a Tragic Nerd. This must be your lucky day, because that's what I'm here to tell you.
Most Tragic Nerds possess several of the following qualities, though Truly Tragic Nerds may possess most, or even all.

1. Glasses With Unflattering Frames. Not to be mistaken for the ironic frames of a hipster-nerd, these frames are likely the cheapest that they were able to find in the optometrist's office, chosen not only to save money for more nerdly aspects of their lives, but also to save time and thought trying to choose something more flattering or interesting. These frames may also have been chosen specifically for their unflattering qualities, to boost the wearer's "nerd cred" within their brethren.
   
2. Ill-Fitting Clothing. Possibly of vintage or hand-me-down origin, these clothes are chosen to save time and thought when getting dressed in the morning. They also succeed in establishing that the wearer cares neither about superficiality in mainstream culture, nor changing fashion trends. Thrift store clothing also saves money that can then be spent on video games or extra computer memory. Additionally, their clothing may have been bought for the wearer by their mother, most often without their presence, at stores such as Old Navy or Costco.
3. Cheap Haircuts. Male Tragic Nerds often sport either buzz cuts or long, greasy hair. Both styles showcase to the rest of the world that they don't care what anyone thinks of them. Both are almost always unflattering. The female Tragic Nerd most often has either a short bob (usually frizzy and unkempt) or long hair that is most often kept either in one long braid, two buns on either side of their head, or pigtails. The uniting trait of all of these hairstyles is the minimal amount of time spent on upkeep, leaving more time to play Dungeons & Dragons or Magic Cards.
4. Always Carries a Book. Books can range from the downright embarrassing (Twilight) to the more intellectual or classic (Lord of the Rings, Steven Erickson, David Eddings)* These books may be carried in a backpack, nylon purse, or perhaps even the pocket of (shudder) cargo pants. Tragic Nerds will often take any spare moment to conspicuously read these books, showcasing their intense nerdity** and indifference to the everyday events going on around them.
5. Always Has Earphones On. Most Tragic Nerds will be listening to something such as the soundtrack to BTVS Once More, With Feeling or the like. They may also listen to scandanavian metal or J-Pop, depending on the specific breed of T.N.

These are only some of the characteristics that many Tragic Nerds share, but I'm bored now and I really can't be bothered to think of any more. Maybe I'll continue this one day, but I really doubt it.

*I'm on my brother's room and these are the books I can see on his closet shelf.
**apparently this is a word now?